An Unexpected Visit

WHAT Y’ALL GETTIN BLESSED WITH TODAY? I wanted to open up this section of my site to address the issue of supernatural HEALING. It is an issue, because I have failed to take advantage of this gift from God. — Don’t stop reading — most people recognize this term more when it is identified as “miracles”. It is all the same thing. If you are someone that struggles with this concept of “miraculous healing” then I encourage you to keep reading… If you don’t know who I am, I am a 22 year old college student/intern. I intern in a Ministerial program with an integrated college site at a church in OKC, so it’s kind of like a dual program. Before that came about I was attending school at a well known university in Oklahoma. I was very young at the time (still am), and had my own house with roommates, so I had a lot of FREEDOM. Too much freedom for my own good, actually. One day while I was waking up from a nap, I had felt a sudden rush urging through my body, almost like hypertension, but not exactly. I did not know what was going on with me. This sensation never occurred to me before, so I went to the ER. At the ER they examined me for various things. They had no idea what was wrong with me either. It wasn’t until the CT Scan showed that I had kidney stones. Again, I had no idea what I did that would’ve caused this. I instantly felt a plague of worry and doubt, because I had only heard the worse from people that went through this experience. I was so negative throughout this whole experience, and was so consumed with my doubt that I failed to bring it to God (and relied on my logistic nature). What I didn’t allow people to know was that months prior to my ER visit I had just went through a season of hating myself. I had just went through a season where I was anorexic, depressed, and dealt with substance abuse. Those were things I knew that could’ve played a huge part of why I had developed kidney stones, but I was afraid if I had shared what I went through that the doctors, and my roommate that was with me, would think I was highkey – borderline cray. So instead of finding a solution to the problem, I doubted God instead. My exact thoughts were “God, if you really loved me why would you deliver me just to point me to a place of more despair and agony?”

Fast forward two weeks later, I went to visit a church camp I had gone to when I was in high school. I was by myself; desperate, alone, ready to give up on God – but holding on by a thread. It was at that moment in worship, when the lead pastor, Grant Pankratz, felt called by the Holy Spirit to speak on the mic and say, “Who needs healing?” I immediately knew he was talking to me. I opened my eyes and started to cry as I raised my hands to the heavens. “If you need healing, place your hand in the affected area where you need healing and pray with me in surrender..” (Grant). It was in that moment that I was crying to God, running after Him in desperation, because He was the only thing I had left. I knew at that moment I had received my miraculous healing. You see, after all this time of me being discouraged because I felt like God had “left me” was just my doubt of not allowing Him to do what only He could do. All this time I was running away from Him (and my struggles), He was pursuing me, with every step I took. He was just waiting for me to come back home. Deuteronomy 31:8 says, “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” If you are looking for a more confirmative answer (I never passed the stones – Praise God!) If you are someone who feels as if God has left you – let me be the first person to tell you that He is a loving God with omnipotent favor over your life. Let me encourage you, as Moses did with the Israelites, it is in those times of surrender where we cling on to the hope we have in Jesus Christ. All you need to do is allow Him in the dirtiest parts of your life, so that He can clean up your mess. He will never leave you nor forsake, and He wouldn’t dare go against His word. -LC

5 shots & two ice packs later!

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